You think your girlfriend’s mind is complex? You are right!
The complaints about women being unpredictable are right. Men don’t know what women want. So now, they have just given up. It feels as if men woke up one day and said, “That’s it. I am done with this. From now on, I am letting her win every time.” And it seems like the perfect solution, too. A relationship wherein one person is continually tapping out and calming the other one down. Because apparently, they want to avoid losing a beautiful part of their life.
But what if you didn’t have to? What if you could live your life without feeling like, a loser? (Pardon me for calling you that) That would be the best thing in the world, wouldn’t it?
How? Well, let’s say that here is the list of 10 unusual things all women expect from men that you didn’t know. These are things that no woman would ever dare tell you. However, since I care for you, I am going to let you in on some life-changing secrets. But you need to read this entire blog till the end. Because it is going to tell you how comfortable you can live your life as a winner without upsetting your woman. EVER!
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1. Be transparent BUT with a dash of diplomacy
Whichever book taught you to be completely honest and open with your significant other is probably not very well-researched. Sure, women want you to be honest with them, but it depends on the situation. You must have heard that you never tell a woman that she is fat when she is pregnant, no matter how much she compels you to tell the truth. Because you know it is for her good and this simple lie is going to help your relationship have a better future.
Similarly, you don’t necessarily have to tell her when you are crushing on a girl and not acting on it. Let’s be mature adults about this and admit the fact that crashes are innocent and they are rarely dangerous, especially if you are not acting on them.
Women don’t expect you to tell them the truth. They hope you to say the things that they want to hear you say!
Imagine the horror that she would experience when you tell her that you like the girl sitting at the next table because she has the perfect set of teeth that make her smile standout amongst a crowd of 250 people. Your girlfriend would spend the rest of the night contemplating her entire life decisions that led to her having a set of teeth that you do not find worth appreciating.
Learn to be diplomatic, boys! Because women don’t expect you tell them the truth, they hope you to be subtle and say the things that they want to hear you say.
2. Take initiatives and responsibilities without being asked to do so
This is a special request to all those who are in a live-in relationship!
Most of the breakups and unhappiness are stemmed from this obnoxious behaviour that men display when they are living with their significant other. And while this may not apply to every man out there, most of the men do not voluntarily share the household chores and take cleanliness for granted.
Your girlfriend/wife/fiancée is not your babysitter that she has to tell you what to do. Being responsible is one of the best and most attractive qualities of a man. Women appreciate it. And it is really not charming when her man only adds to the pile of work she already has for the entire day. Start small and slowly incorporate a few responsible habits as a part of your routine.
For example, start with putting your clothes in the laundry bag yourself when you come home. She does it, so can you! And even if you don’t immediately do it and leave it for later, that’s okay, too. Just assure her that you will do it before going to bed. She would not mind waiting.
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3. Be mature while communicating and solving a problem
There is a category of women in this world that does not like asking for help because they prefer to help themselves out before letting anyone else in on the matter. And if you are fortunate enough to be with such an independent and pragmatic woman, you would know how sensible she is.
So, when such a woman puts down her guard and looks outside her self for help, try to be as cooperative as possible. Your woman would only ask for your advice when she has a problem that she cannot solve on her own and needs an external perspective. And if she is approaching you for it, consider yourself to be highly intelligent in her eyes because you are the chosen one.
Try to be mature and rational when giving advice. Had she wanted bad ideas or poor solutions, she would have gone to other people that are not as smart as she is. Don’t communicate absurdly, don’t just say things for the sake of saying, don’t waste her time and above all, don’t make her regret coming to you.
4. Be ready for exploring and taking up an adventure
This may be something that even men expect from their women but let’s limit ourselves to women’s expectations here. She knows that you are tired after coming home from work and frankly, so is she. But she wants you not to be one of those couples who spend their lives sitting on a couch and watching TV till they fall asleep, irrespective of whether or not you are living together.
She wants your relationship to be more than a “takeout for two, please.” And there is nothing wrong in that, you know. Couples need to keep having fun to avoid getting bored with each other. We are humans, and we hate routines. Go to an arcade gaming centre if nothing else. It is refreshing and, in my experience, it brings out the best in people because it is so competitive that you learn about your strengths as a couple.
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5. Show common sense if not telepathic abilities
The rate of relationships breaking because of simple reasons such as lack of common sense is way too high so, take notes.
I am not saying that women are straightforward to be with. We are incredibly complicated beings. So, it is impossible to guess what goes on in our minds. And that is why, in such cases, common sense goes a long way. Simple things like separating your socks from your other clothes are not something that should be told to you, but it is a thing that may lead to her getting extremely upset, which would then lead to her reconsidering her decision of being with you. So, steer clear of that zone, my friend and get some common sense.
6. Be stable – financially and emotionally
Since the wave of feminism hit us in the internet era (a good thing, by the way), women have begun to expect less from their man regarding money because they choose to be financially independent themselves. While this is a great thing, some things should remain the way they initially were. And one such thing is women expecting men to be financially stable.
Being a part of a patriarchal society, we know that a man’s income is worth more than that of a woman’s. It is a sad truth. So, every woman wants a man who can take care of her when all she wants to do is a shop and give her child the best education possible and buy the best selection of watches for her man, even if it means spending his own money for it. Understand that your woman has grown up with a father who has always taken care of her finances and if she is with you, she wants you to be the same person to her and her kids that her father was to her and her mother.
Even if your woman can handle her expenses, be financially stable for her!
I know that no matter how well I put it, it is going to sound anti-feministic. But I am only here to state the facts and not make you like women. The truth is there are still a majority of women who prefer security over risks and therefore if you are with one such woman, prepare to be stable in your finances.
Similarly, a man who can hold himself together is handsome for women. While this does not mean that you need to be tough all the time, but being emotionally stable is a good quality to have even for yourself.
So, to conclude, even if your woman can handle her expenses and you are allowed to be mushy, be financially and emotionally stable for her.
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7. Understand the occurrences of mood swings during periods
“No uterus, no opinion” is probably the most valid statement ever spoken. You do not know how many periods cramps hurt. If men suffered through pain like that, they would surely be equally moody, if not more, just like women. AsapSCIENCE has a great video that shows how periods affect the entire female biological system with or without its occurrence. Notice how women have mood swings throughout the month? That’s because when we are on our period, we go through extreme hormonal changes. And when we are not on our period, our body is preparing itself for the next period, which is not a delightful process either.
So, excuse your woman for being exceptionally unreasonable during her periods. She has mood swings but guesses what? So, do you! Perhaps not so frequently but you do. And the best way to cheer her up is by buying her an ice-cream. Let her eat and compliment her enough. Sounds cheesy but it works. Also, be nice and allow her to oversleep because there are high possibilities that she has not slept all night properly.
8. Act like a grown up
As mentioned earlier, your woman is not your babysitter. Nope, she is not your mother either but good try.
Now, I am not saying that you let them go on a male-bashing rant like JLo. God help her! But don’t allow her to refer to you as a man-child either. You are an adult so, behave like one. Be a little organised. Nobody likes to live with a pig, however cute they are.
Set career goals and create strategies to reach them!
Here are a few things that you can do to be a grown up in your woman’s eyes –
- Set career goals and create strategies to reach them. And share them with her.
- Have self-control even when you are splurging.
- Learn how to dress. Colours and combinations should not be Greek to you. Small checks and Hawaiian floral patterns are not for you if you are in your 20s. Mandarin or Chinese collar shirts are only useful if they don’t make your face look like a giant pumpkin. Lastly, wear nice belts.
- Take a shower before you set a record.
- Be mindful and conscious at all times.
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9. Be sure about your masculinity
There is nothing more off-putting than a man who needs constant reassurance that he is manly enough for his woman. If she loves you, it means she is sure of you. Therefore, avoid being ‘that’ person and quit being insecure.
It is okay if you like watching romantic comedies and end up crying at the end of the movie. Don’t worry if like the floral-printed bone china better than the plain ones. Also, it is fine if you cross-dress in your woman’s clothes sometimes just to make her laugh. It is okay if you wish to be a stay-at-home dad and take care of the family instead of stepping out and earning. It does not matter because all this does not define your masculinity. Therefore, don’t be insecure because you are perfect the way you are.
10. Exhibit limited chivalry
Kept the easiest for the last. Know what is fairness and what is pure condescendence. No matter how much people tell you that courage is a subtle form of sexism, don’t listen to them. Those are blinded views of that part of the society that has forgotten the most fundamental component of dignity, which is that it is not just for men. Women are also required to be chivalrous.
Learn the difference between the two. Holding doors open and pulling out chairs for her is chivalry and women love you for doing that (because well, honestly, with all our heels and the heavy handbags, opening doors is a tad confusing) whereas binding us to the kitchen is pure sexism.
So, see how easy to understand all that was? A nudge in the right direction can make anyone a man of her dreams. All you need to have is a tad willingness and patience to do the right thing for the health of your relationship’s future. And now that you know the secrets, don’t be greedy and keep all this with you. Share this treasure with your fellowmen who are struggling to meet their women’s expectations and would love to know these secrets to unlock the perfect balance in their relationships. Good luck!